Sunday, January 25, 2009
Not the PHaT kind
Well hell. I'm fat again.
There was approximately 10 minutes of my life when I thought I was in moderately good shape. I was 5 lbs from reaching my goal weight (that's the weight I listed on my drivers license.) Now I'm 15 lbs away from the goal. Crap.
Okay, I was 25 lbs away from the goal for a time, but seriously, I am not happy. My ass has spread, I feel like my throat is fat. I'm ruining my health again, raising my blood sugar, eating things I have mild allergies to and making myself crankilicious. Urgh.
And who is responsible for this downfall? Who is responsible for making my wardrobe smaller? ME! I'm an idiot. I know how to eat healthy and make the right choices. I know how this crap makes me feel. I know I only have one body and one life to feel 100% me (which, at 100% I am so awesome I almost have to slap myself. ) Right now I'm about 25% me. I'm far from obese, but I'm REALLY unhappy with what I've done to myself. Honestly, I don't have body issues, I just want to eat healthy and feel better. Period.
I'm gonna stop bitching and go for a run, which is hard on my knees cause I'm fat again. Dangnabbit!!!
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